Ela Mesma Company

Dispora Dance Theatre

The end of the tour!

I am celebrating because I finished my Rainbow Butterfly Tour!(watch a sneak peak here), and we will be showing the full work next month (3rd September) sign up for your ticket here… plus next month there will be the big Abs Challenge reveal… and how to get involved FREE on the next Abs Challenge! 🙂


Our one day retreat with Yoga Kula and the Harewood Estate yesterday was absolutely beautiful (pictures coming soon on instagram)…


Today I am at SIRF in Stockton


Plus the last PowerUp! Episode of Season 5 is out this morning!


On Friday, on social media, I asked what the word, ‘boundary’ means to you, and you had some great responses including,

“The edge of where you can roam freely”

“Boundaries disappear when I can be”

“The invisible for of protection that occurs naturally when we honour our values”

What great reflections and offerings! What about you Ella? What do they mean to you?

We may not think of boundaries as a type of self-care, but they’re actually a foundational part of our emotional health, and this is why I trained with Betty Martin in the Wheel Of Consent, and I am really excited to be going on a Wheel facilitators retreat with her later this month!


I offer Wheel of Consent tools such as “The Three Minute Game”, teaching the Wheel and the shadows of the wheel, “Waking the Hands” and the “I Want Game” as part of my Goddxx Path 9 month training programme as well as covering aspects of the work in Embodied Alchemy & my Retreats, but if you want a sneak preview experience, I invite you to notice how you ask for things (how much power there is in the words we speak) and to start using the following two ways of asking ONLY!


“May I ….?”


“Will you…?”




Because then we don’t leak into the shadow sides of asking (taking or stealing). As we use these two question, we may start to notice that our asks might be less questions and more demands… that often we are not really in consent when we ask for something.
This week, I asked my housemate, “Will you take my washing out the dryer?”. I was running late and so rather than hang it out, I had put the dryer on. I messaged her as I left the house and realised… “Oh my Goddxx! I haven’t actually offered her an option!” I was in the shadow side of benefitting from the actions of others!


When we use only the two questions “May I & “Will you?”, we start to notice how hard it can be to ask for what we want, and how often we are not really being asked, or asking ‘properly’ (for example in my story above). Sometimes, we are actually manipulating or bribing or just downright taking when we don’t ask properly… and sadly… there is always a price to pay for that, (whether it’s obvious in the moment or not)!


When we ask using these two questions, we are more likely to notice the ways that others are setting aside their limits for us… and so we can have more respect for others and in turn for ourselves.


So what do you think beautiful soul? Will you give “May I” & “Will you” a go this month?

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